I am restless. I am finding myself bored with the predictability of my days. There is a desire to get in the car and just drive and see where it takes me. To quit my job and see what I can do to piece together the income that is needed.
Now don't worry, this is not a desire to flee my family. I am so completely in love with my husband that even on the days where he drives me crazy I wouldn't dream of taking off on adventures without him. And of course the same goes for Miles. How could anyone ever abandon their children? Miles is such a huge part of my heart and my soul. I wonder some f this restlessness is more a product of my worry that we don't give him enough variety in his experiences. He is a child of routine and pattern and I want him to be able to be free spirited and adaptable to crazy new fun experiences.
We went to the state fair yesterday and I think Miles enjoyed it, but he was so uncertain of this new situation that he wanted to be carried the entire time by Mitch and I...that was no fun. But then again, he is not even three yet, I know as he gets older he will be less shy in new situations...or at least I hope so. But what if he doesn't? What if he is always nervous and clingy when we meet new people or go to new places? Have I been too protective of him?
What I would love is to be able to say to my family, "pack the car, we are going on an adventure" and have no argument, no trouble and just have fun. And that it wouldn't matter where we end up. At the end of it we could come home dirty and tired but incredibly relaxed and happy.
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You know, I have those same thoughts, and those same reactive thoughts...and then the other reactive thoughts too :) I wonder sometimes if we're not giving Grayson enough variety, but I think this age is about getting their bearings and their security. They need routine, familiarity, and don't like change, so maybe that's what they need at 2 and 3. First get a sense of where home base is and then as they get older they'll venture out and enjoy these activities. I'm not saying we should keep our children hidden from new experiences, god no, but maybe it's ok that they don't like new things right now. Maybe it's ok to focus on home things and familiar things until they give us the sign that they're bored and it's time to explore :)
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