The First Time

As I get closer to my due date I have been thinking more and more about my pregnancy, labor and delivery of Miles. For the most part it was great, but there are things I wish had gone differently.

Mitch and I decided in the fall of 2004 that we were ready to start a family and decided that after Christmas I would discontinue my birth control and we would let nature have its way. We both knew that it could take months to actually get pregnant, especially since I had been on the pill for so long. So Christmas day I took my last pill. When my "Aunt Flo" came for her monthly visit in January I was dissapointed yes, but also not surprised - reminding myself that it can take time I had a big glass of red wine (which I had been not partaking of) and moved forward. In mid February I got sick - fever, chills....body ache - horrid. This was on a Friday - also the same day that my usually like clockwork period should have started. By Sunday I was feeling somewhat better but not 100% - we were heading up to Portland for birthday dinner for Alex and "little" Alex and I was contemplating taking some cold meds to help with my stuffiness and general miserable outlook on life. My concern was whether I could possibly be pregnant - Mitch and I both thought it strange I was three days late at this point but really didn't think I was- so I went ahead.

On the way home from dinner I wanted to stop at the store and pick up a pregnancy test - just to know for sure. Mitch and I stopped and I picked up a two pack....figured two wasn't too outrageous as I most likely was not pregnant. When we got home I took the test and tried very hard to not sit and stare at it for the requisite 3-5 minutes it takes to process. The timer went off and I steeled myself for dissapointment - not that it was needed. The test showed positive and I called Mitch in to share the news. We both were a bit surprised but also excited and anxious at the same time. This was on February 13th 2005 - Happy Valentines Day!!

Monday I called my dr's office to see if I could come in for an official test, they said I could bring in a sample and then call for the results later in the week. I don't remember which day I dropped off the sample, but I do know it was Thursday morning that I could call to find out the official verdict. Thursday morning came around and when I awoke I found I was bleeding - not heavily - but enough that it concerned me a great deal. So when I called and they gave me the positive result I also asked them what I should do. The nurse said to come in for a blood test that would measure a certain hormone and then they would do it again two days later to see that the level doubled. She then wanted me to go home and be on "pelvic rest" for the day. Basically if I was having a miscarriage there was nothing they could do. I went in for the test and then headed home. I was wreck and just stayed in bed the rest of the day. By this time the bleeding was more or less spotting, not any heavier than it was but still there. I did go to work the next day but took it pretty easy. The only person at work that knew was the teacher I was working with.

Saturday morning I went in for the second part of the test and then Mitch and I headed to Bend for a weekend with friends. We went back and forth on the way of whether to tell them about the baby. At this point although I was still spotting I did not appear to be losing the baby and so I decided worrying too much was just bad for me and I needed to be positive. We did tell our friends and they of course were thrilled - but at the same time they told us they were moving to Arizona....so some bad with the good. But we had a great weekend and my girl friend regaled me with stories of family members who had very complicated and bleedy pregnancies only to go on and deliver very healthy babies - herself included.

The rest of the first trimester was great. I had very little morning sickness, had a good appetite and did fairly well energy wise. I did take many naps once I got home though. Mitch and I also decided it was time to buy a house and started looking for the right place. As I moved into the second trimester I could no longer hide the belly from the kids at school, one day as I was helping one of my girls she asked me "Mrs. Jones....are you pregnant?" so I had to tell them all. They of course were happy for me, and also were much more understanding of why I was always eating in class.

In June many things happened: I got laid off, we found a house, and we found out that we were having a boy. Although the first was a bummer - I started applying for other jobs and was able to get unemployment. The house we found was a great two bedroom with a HUGE yard where we still continue to live. And of course we were thrilled about the boy - he was healthy and everything looked great. Also in June I got to go visit friends in Arizona and LA for the LA friends baby shower. Her little guy was born two weeks later - a bit early- although out of the little boys he has always been the biggest.

In July my Mom, Sister, Nephew and I drove to Montana to visit my Grammie - it was a good trip and my Nephew seemed to really enjoy feeling his cousin kick and wiggle in the belly. It was also an interesting trip because my family saw a different side of me who wasn't willing to sacrifice comfort and needs for them. Mainly it was my Grammie (who I adored) that seemed to have a hard time dealing with this side of me.

The rest of summer and the second trimester were good - we moved into our house on the 24th of July and I was able to paint the Baby's room and start to get everything ready - of course I had help from my awesome Mother in Law and husband with the painting. I enjoyed being home. I could nap when I wanted, and Mitch and I often had lunch and other time together. As we got into fall I learned that another good friend was pregnant and due in May.

I was pretty darn big by the third trimester, but I still felt good and I don't remember being as tired - of course being at home I could nap and rest whenever I needed it. The baby was due October 21st. We took our birth class, packed a hospital bag and were ready. The 21st came and went. Nothing was happening - my dr's appointment on my due date showed no movement on the cervix whatsoever - as Mitch put it I was, "Locked up tighter than Fort Knox". We went for walks almost every night and contractions would start and then as soon as we got back home they would stop again. Looking back I know they weren't really real contractions....they hardly hurt and were much more like braxton hicks than anything else. I was starting to get discouraged.

On the morning of October 27th I woke up around 5am and needed to pee. I was sitting on the toilet and leaned forward to get a new roll of tp. As I did so I felt and heard a POP. There was also a gush. The water had broken....